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James Joyce was Probably an HSP with ADD

James Joyce was Probably an HSP with ADD

April 19, 2015 by Scott Todnem

by Michelle Lynn

Stream of Consciousness Writing by the Sleep Deprived.

It’s that late already?  I really meant to get in here sooner.  Wait.  I think my alarm clock is ten minutes faster than the clock on the microwave.  I should check that.  It is.  I wonder how that happened.  I bet it’s from trying to hit the alarm off in the morning, and missing, and then advancing the time ahead.  I wonder how off the time would be if I didn’t change it back for over a year?  11:11 I always look at the time in palindromes.  That’s a palindrome, right?  Same forwards as backwards.  I wonder what the odds are that I always look at the clock like that?  It has to be pretty rare.  Maybe I only remember looking at the clock though when I mentally note it’s a palindrome.  I bet I look at the clock a lot more than I actually think, but it’s just memorable when it happens to be a palindrome.  When in Rome.  That doesn’t apply, but it rhymes.  The word Rome still makes me laugh.  I wish I could remember how old I was when I discovered that “Roman Cokes” were actually rum and cokes.  It’s funny how people can mishear things so often, and be confused for so long.  It feels really warm in here.  I don’t want to turn the air up.  The electric bill was already too high last month, and it’s just April.  Forgot to sew the button back on my Spring jacket.  I wonder if it’s still in the right hand pocket.  That was over a year ago, but I haven’t worn it since.  I better get up and check.  I don’t have to sew it now, but I can in the morning.  Just want to make sure that it’s still there.  It is.  That was the day I was going to Olive Garden with my Grandmother.  I shouldn’t have tugged at it so hard as I was driving.  I don’t even notice I’m pulling or gripping too tightly sometimes.  I haven’t talked to her in so long.  I should really call her.  No, I’d rather email her.  I don’t know what to say.  She’ll probably just lecture me for not calling in so long.  I wonder if that’s how it will be when I’m old.  Will people just not call me for months at a time.  Will I just be sitting there all alone, waiting for someone to contact me.  I might be grumpy then too.  I never thanked my friend for that article on using lavender oil to help you sleep.  It doesn’t really, but it was nice of her to think of me.  I should really send her an email now before I forget again.  I can just keep it short.  I’d rather just send a message through Facebook or a text.  Email seems formal or something now.  If I get on Facebook though, I’m sure someone will see I’m active.  They’ll want to talk, but if they need to talk then it’s good that I am there.  My left temple has a stabbing pain in it.  I keep getting migraines.  I wonder if I have a tumor.  I should Google that.  Never mind.  That’s not going to help me relax.  I don’t understand why that woman at the meeting today looked at me so strangely when I said that I don’t have a credit card, just a debit card?  It doesn’t mean anything is wrong or I can’t get one.  It just means I don’t like using them.  Hey, that’s what the En Vogue song meant by the lyrics, “Buy things with cash.  That doesn’t mean that all my credit’s bad.”  I never understood that until now.  Wait.  Did I put that book in my school bag that I want to copy a page out of tomorrow?  I better check that.  Funny.  I don’t remember doing that.  Her covers look too close to her face.  I wonder if that makes it harder for her to breathe.  Should I pull them down?  I don’t want to wake her.  I don’t want her to not be able to breathe though either.  I better just pull them down a little.  There.  That’s better.  I never made any notes for that presentation tomorrow.  I never look at my notes though anyway.  Maybe I should just practice what I want to say in my head now.  That’s kind of like rehearsing.  Why won’t that dog stop barking.  It’s been hours.  I wonder what he wants?  I hope they didn’t leave for the night and not leave him any water again.  Maybe he’s hungry?  I just need him to stop barking.  I can’t sleep.  I don’t like the way the fabric of the pillowcase rubs on my earrings.  That feeling really bothers me.  I could take them out, but they are so small.  I don’t think my holes would close up now.  It’s been a really long time since I had them pierced.  It was weird how that guy at the grocery store asked how many piercings I had in the other ear.  I wouldn’t have a different number than I had in my left ear.  I think people used to do that though.  I’m thirsty.  I should just drink water, because I think that anything else will keep me up.  I hope that the secretary knew I was being sarcastic when I said, “no kidding” to her.  I might have said it in the wrong tone.  It might have upset her.  She shifted a little in her chair and looked down before laughing.  That’s usually a sign of discomfort.  I really hope I didn’t make her uncomfortable.  I’ll have to walk by and say something nice tomorrow.  Tomorrow.  It’s almost tomorrow.  I better just really try and sleep now.  I can get almost two and a half hours if I fall asleep this second…

Truth be told.  I don’t have a sleeping problem.  It's more like I have a thinking problem.

April 19, 2015 /Scott Todnem
ADD, ADHD, blog, bloggers, blogging, busy, HSP, James Joyce, Life, narrative, packed, personal, reflect, reflection, rest, schedule, self, self-reflection, sleep, stories, work, writers, writing
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